Back at it:

After a little vacation time at home to have ACL surgery, I'm back in NY, back in Dyker Heights, back into the Spanish, back into the daily study time, back into chasing after buses, back into eating chino bake everyday - back into the wonderful life of a missionary(:

It wasn't all easy peasy to get back into though.

The decision alone just about had me.

Flashback:

Tuesday, January 14th, the night I told my parents I wouldn't be going back out on a mission but that I would be staying home, working until school came around, and taking care of one of the sweetest girls you would ever meet who's mom recently had a tragedy and wound up in a comma. I couldn't leave her in such a state. I thought it was a worth while cause, as did my parents, but they also knew that there was something even better I could be doing with my time. The disappointment was obvious, their faces said it all, but they didn't stay quiet for long as they went on to explain that I had agency, it was my choice and I would have their full support BUT they believed that finishing up what I started, that is, serving the Lord in NY for another year, was the appropriate thing to do at this time.
They didn't push, they simply tried to widen my vision.

 I left the conversation with the intent to think things over. After watching Tangled, my eyes, swollen from excessive cries of confusion, were heavy and I gave in. I woke up the next morning with places to go and people to see. As tradition would have it, I was running late to meet up with Andrea and Cassandra for breakfast. Right before I ran out the door I got a call from my Stake President saying that I had just received permission from mission headquarters to return to the mission so long as I followed the guidelines my physical therapist had given me. He told me I would be flying out Monday morning and my itinerary would be sent ASAP. I told the news to my father, gave him a quick hug, then left before the dam could break and release another waterfall of tears.

Who would've ever guessed I was such a cryer?!

Munching on bagels and sipping our fresh squeezed OJ - the perfect setting to break the news. Cass and Andrea, after talking about school and finances for the first 20 mins, decided it was time to ask me what I was up to. Casually I said, "Well, I'm heading back to New York on Monday." The looks on their faces reflected what I was feeling inside, they were quite priceless as they changed from confusion (Did they hear me right?), to shock (That's less than a week!), to excitement (NY!), to sadness (But we'll miss you!), to happiness for me since after 6 months of waiting I was back to doing what I wanted to do - serving as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Though that was entertaining to watch and answer all of the questions that followed, I'm quite proud of the way I delivered the new to my precious mother. 

After breakie and a bit of shopping at T.J. Maxx for some hidden treasures, it was time to head to the dentist. My mom is a spectacular hygienist. I went to her office to get my teeth cleaned and we jumped right into talking about how breakfast went, how my friends were, what their families are doing, and all of that good jazz. Her boss came in shortly after that to checkup on me and after asking if I have any cool plans for the week I told him, "Well I leave on Monday so I assume my weekend will be consumed in the packing process."

My mother, bless her heart, then asks, "And where exactly are you going to on Monday?"

My happy reply: "New York!"

My mom: "I'm so glad I get to find out that my daughter leaves to New York for a year at the same time the rest of the office does. I thought you might have the decency to tell your mother about those things first." Her boss and I just started laughing, in fact, even as I type this I'm laughing! I can still picture her in her scrubs with a look of both shock and humor.

It was a surprise to her as well as myself.

But the main surprise to me was how much peace I felt after I had FINALLY made the official decision to return to New York to do missionary work.

Before I had so many mixed thoughts and emotions. I couldn't sort it all out. I was having such a wrestle!

Wrestle.

 That reminds me of a familiar story, the one of Joseph Smith when he was trying to pray to know which church was true and he experienced the powers of the devil trying to stop him.

Or when Enos tells of his big repentance story and he tells "of the wrestle which [he] had" (Enos 1:2).

That wrestle is Satan trying to stop us from accomplishing a great work. Why on earth would he want another missionary out on the streets of New York telling people they can be with their family for forever, that when we do wrong we can be forgiven, teaching them that it doesn't just stop at the bible but it includes the Book of Mormon as well since there were prophets in the Americas too. In fact, there still is! We have a living prophet today named Thomas S. Monson! Why would God, who loves us sssoooo much, leave us without any direction? No way folks. He has given us a prophet for just that reason, to lead and guide His church. HIS church! The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. This is the good news!

Here is your official invite to learn more! Feel free to ask me about any questions you have - that's what I'm here for!

You can also visit this website: https://www.lds.org.